I don’t remember the first time that I saw Jeff Foxworthy perform his comedy routine….”If you…..you might be a red-neck” but on a long drive today I was thinking about it in regards to the Narcissist.
I had to entertain myself since the 405 freeway is such a long drive….you know why they call it the 405 don’t you? Because it takes 4 or 5 hours to get there….baaah dump bump…..Anyway.
I came up with some amusing…well they were amusing to me…(actually true to life….really) one liners on …”You might be a Narcissist if….” Here’s a few.
If you are more concerned about your performance, presentation, or hair, more than the client who just fainted in the conference room….you might be a narcissist. If, after stepping over same client, who is crumpled on the floor, you ask another client “How is the sound? Can you hear in the back?” before immediately calling 911…You might be a narcissist.
If, when you hear that someone was terminated you respond, “Good, we never liked her anyway…” (Who’s WE?) You might be a narcissist.
If, after hearing that a “friend” is very upset for a co-worker regarding a family situation….you reply…..”Hope you are not going to ‘get all emotional’ and let it get in the way of us enjoying this expensive dinner that I’m paying for…..!” You might be a narcissist.
If you make totally inappropriate comments to staff, clients, general public, co-workers, family & “friends”…You might be a narcissist.
(Remember, “friends” is in quotations because the Narcissist really doesn’t have any.)
When you get “called on” for your behavior and comments and you respond by saying “That’s just something I say”…deny having made the comment, or just give a shrug of indifference….You might be a narcissist.
If you take a risk to perform a repair you have no experience with, and aren’t electrocuted…. PITY
…You might be a narcissist.