My thanks to Mike Peters of Mother Goose and Grim for the illustration
I have said in previous posts that the narcissist had the art of “dead to me” down to an art form.
I looked up the definition – which was not easy to find – here is a paraphrased version:
Dead to me:
Is it an adjective or a verb? – 1. It is the expression of such utter distaste/repulsion for a person or an object that it calls for the personal denial of their/its worldly existence.
It can be used to express disinterest or even hatred for something or someone who has ‘gone out of style.’
E.G. “Torn jeans are so last season, they are dead to me.” Really? Not judging by the teenagers I see at the mall; I see way more flesh than I would ever want to – Not so much style as it is easy access, I guess –
“Gone out of style” that’s a nice way of putting it. When you are discarded by the narcissist, you are outdated, a fashion faux pas.
Dead to me:
2. A phrase used as a comeback to let someone know you are done with them.
E. G. Mike: Dude, I gotta tell you I did it with you mom.
Dan: Man! You. Are. Dead. To me!!
At least for the two buddies, when Dan says he will never speak to Mike again, Mike has a pretty good idea why….shagging his mom falls within the boundaries of unforgivable indiscretions.
When the narcissist is done with you, rarely are you given a reason.
“You’re dead to me” is attributed to being an old English saying that was used to announce that the person in question was disowned and would never be “seen” or “heard” from again.
I thought it was a yiddish or Jewish saying after seeing Fiddler on the Roof. I hate to think that breaking all ties with someone is a tradition…
In the Broadway musical, the father renounces his daughter because she wants to marry a man outside of her faith.
I thought how heartless, how could he not be happy for his child? Well, the father is not nearly as heartless as the narcissist. By the end of the play the father acknowledges his daughter and wishes her happiness.
Happiness….something that you never find with a narcissist.